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Student of life
In adult quickie, I mention having to force yourself to interpret your the world differently as a means of coping. While one may find themselves naturally miserable, it may not be the correct view to have with respect to their hand. Intuitive or natural is not always correct and will lead to more wrong conclusions — read more
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Ball and Paraboloid
Only a few years ago was I depressed. No energy, no motivation, suicidal ideation… the whole works. However, there was a sort of emotional clarity present. My feelings were raw and real. Insights into human nature and condition flowed through my mind. I saw (at least what felt like) philosophical truth. Superficiality, hollowness of norms, — read more
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Nothing
This one won’t be very directed, a bit messy. A sort of compilation of some recent recurring thoughts… I guess to do with morals and mental flexibility with respect to ageing. About two weeks ago, Luigi Mangione murdered the CEO of United Health Care. His motives something like that of the Unabomber. Both had post-conventional — read more
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Readjusting the mind’s eye
“If you want to study the stars after being in a brightly lit room, you must wait… There must be similar periods of waiting if the focal length of the mind is to readjust, withdrawing from the world’s glare to the internal recesses of the mind” – Huston Smith. I take the world’s glare to — read more
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Personal Revelation
I had a revelation about myself a few minutes ago. It’s pushing 4am and Im tired so this probably wont be very coherent Doing some introspection to bubbled up to me the reason why I was attracted to pure math and religion. Not the abrahamic religions or mahayana sect of buddhism, i’m talking about the — read more
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A bit on emotion and expectations
The last month-ish I had a physics final, an actuary exam, and a paper. Each of these I studied extensively for / worked hard on and got results I expected. What I wanted to say was, I didn’t particularly feel proud nor excited over accomplishing these items. When a result is expected, I don’t think — read more
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The Doldrums
Tangentially related to the last Confucius bit, I’d like write to some personal feelings in this one. I’m a loser. A loser in the context of everything that is normal. But what is normal? Simply what is most common and naturalized in some grouping. More comprehensively, what is perceived to be most common and therefore — read more
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Dumb utilitarian brain
For the sake of understanding is enough for me, intellectually. But that isn’t enough to make my body follow through. My brain and body are annoyingly misaligned most of the time. For example, I have been stuck playing a certain online game called League of Legends (LoL) for a large chunk of my life, and — read more
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Deranged ramblings of a schizoid
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